Looking out of the car window, I stare endlessly at rows of cornfields and cows in the home I call the Midwest. Six-year-old me kicks the seat, demanding an iPhone at that very moment.

My sister turns around to face me.

“Yusra, look out the window. You are not getting a phone right now,” Imani Khan said.

I didn’t know it then, but her refusal to give in to my thrashing taught me not to be so connected to my phone in a world of social media and instant gratification. Through this, she taught me to be observant and notice details, not only in the world around me, but in people as well.

Ever since I was young, one of the first people that I wholeheartedly looked up to was my older sister Imani, or as I call her, Api, meaning sister in Bangla.

With an age gap of 11 years, she has been more than a sister, she has been an advisor to me. Being the youngest sibling with a lengthy age gap has also matured me faster, in ways that I only am beginning to understand.

At a young age, I felt as if my mind was too far ahead of my body. I remember finding myself in situations where kids my age would be disrespectful and take petty arguments to heart. I looked at these situations in awe as to how friendships would fall apart due to a joke taken too far, or people refusing to look at their own mistakes.

In a way, growing up around my sister taught me to be aware of social behaviors much earlier on than my peers — a skill today I am proud of. I learned how to read tone, recognize insecurity and not to take rudeness personally. 

Oftentimes, my sister would not only advise me with words, but with actions too.

She has always worn the hijab in public, normalizing it in my life. She memorized the Holy Quran by age 12, inspiring me to also memorize and understand the Quran.

As a kid, I often did not understand the why behind these actions, just that I wanted to follow my sister’s example. As I grew older, I began to understand the why behind these actions.

Perhaps the biggest lesson she has taught me and continues to remind me at her age of 27, is that all of this is accredited to God, not her. 

Now, when I look out the window I don’t reach for a screen. Instead, I think and observe. And oftentimes I trace the way I see the world back to her – and the way she traces everything back to God.

Follow Yusra (@ykhan0031) and @CHSCampusNews on X.