First, I would like to clarify that I am not writing this article for sympathy or to sound demeaning to addicts. Instead, I write this article to inform and help people who have been affected by an addict and or addiction.

Families worldwide are affected with parental drug addiction, I being one of them. Addiction can be defined as a condition of being addicted to a particular substance. According to Drug Rehab, more than eight million children live with at least one parent who is addicted to drugs or alcohol.

Addiction is a chronic brain disease causing the addict to seek and use drugs. Initially the process is voluntary, however, after repeated use it takes over any self control the addict once had. The addict loses all ability to decide for himself, habitually going back to the drug, making it merely impossible to stop.

Growing up with a parent who is an addict is very difficult and everyday is a struggle. The hardest part is watching someone you love hurt himself and wondering what will transpire next. Days are spent questioning why and blaming yourself for things that are out of your control.

For me, it all started when I was younger. I did not know my family was not normal and that in fact my family was considered unhealthy. All I knew was that my father was different and that his random outbursts were something I was used to. I felt as if I could not relate to anyone.

Then my world started to crumble. I realized that my life was not the same as everyone else picture perfect family. Hiding my hideous secret was detrimental to me, but once people heard their reactions were pessimistic and uncaring. People no longer wanted to be around me because I was a daughter of an addict. I was no longer a child.

My life had changed. I was growing up faster than most children. I saw and heard things children should not have to deal with. Everything was embarrassing. Everywhere my family went there was a scene. From drunk arguments with the waiter to harassing his own family, my father became outrageous.

My family started to fall apart, no one could deal with my father’s drunk and belligerent behavior. Nights consisted of police showing up to my house to dispute problems of disturbance. Friends wondered why my father was never around or when he was, why he was always drunk. I remained answerless. I did not know myself; I did not know why my father could see me hurting but did not change. I did not know why I would have to wait inside a car for hours while he attended a party to get drunk. I did not know why family events were proximal to bars. I did not know why my father would curse when asked why he was acting weird. I simply did not understand.

I wanted answers. I wanted to know why, why my father chose alcohol over his own family. I wanted to know if he would ever realize that no matter how much I hated him for his decisions that I would always love him. I wanted to know if he would ever change.

However now I have recollected; I have learned to see the beauty. I am not the parent who raised me, I am me. I am not the child of an addict, I am the child who was loved; loved by a mother who did everything in her power to protect me. I am the child who learned that family comes first. I am a human who learned that I am important and I do have a meaning. Being a child of an addict does not define you. Instead it makes you stronger and teaches you various things; how to turn anger into a good thing, how to love and how not to give up.

Now, I no longer feel alone. I know people care and others have dealt with the same, if not similar issues. I know that I am a person who will not allow my father’s decision to define my own. I want to be known for my life and my life choices, not the choices of others.

Drug and alcohol addiction is not something that should be taken lightly. If you know someone who is affected or dealing with an addiction problem ask them to seek help, and know you are not alone.