As I sit in my AP Calculus AB class, I stare intensely at a worksheet filled with equations and tables. Even though my teacher explained the concept just minutes ago, I have forgotten everything. All the numbers, letters and symbols blend in a calculus whirlpool and I feel a headache developing. 

This headache then leads to a string of contemplative thoughts, starting with asking why I chose to take yet another math class after barely surviving AP Precalculus last year. Why did I knowingly insert myself into this mentally challenging and demanding environment? Why did I allow myself to be in such a stimulating setting when I could have been doing anything else?

It is during times such as these that I like to think back to elementary school. A time filled with carefree, joyful memories. A time when I spent my days frolicking with friends and building LEGO sets. A time when I learned how to multiply numbers, not manipulate them. 

Although there is some truth to my memory of the past, I often overlook any struggles or challenges that I faced. At the end of the day, the happy memories are the ones that stick with us, so why waste time remembering the negatives, right? 

Wrong. 

The parts of my past that tested me or pushed me out of my comfort zone are the ones that are worth remembering.  

If I had never fallen while learning how to walk, my life would be vastly different. If I had not learned how to sound out letters, it would have been difficult for me to discover my love for words. If I had given up on going to dance class because my legs hurt, I never would have discovered my passion.  

If I did not have the ability to persevere through and conquer the obstacles in my way, I would not be the person I am today. 

Growth is constant, always evolving. Whether mastering a math concept, finishing a 3,000-piece LEGO set or acceptance into college, my successes are only as good as the effort that I put into them. 

Regardless of where I am in life, there will always be demanding situations to face, but it is my responsibility to myself to do everything I can to become a better person. There is no use in dwelling on the past if it prevents embracing the present, but I will always appreciate the ease with which I view my younger self’s experiences. 

So, even though I cannot wrap my head around derivatives right now, who knows, maybe I will look back in five years and wish that I was in high school, although I highly doubt that. 

Follow Sukirtha (@suki_muthiah) and @CHSCampusNews on X.