Please read this with discretion as it will include spoilers.

I swiftly click on Disney+ on my TV, sitting on my couch in the comfort and luxury of my living room, ready to watch a new rendition of one of the many tales I indulged in as a child, Pinocchio (2022). 

I’ve grown fond of the opening credits with the esteemed castle and song “When You Wish Upon a Star” that Disney uses famously for its movies. When I heard that same tune this time, I felt a rush of reminiscence and happiness flow through my body. My arms formed slight goosebumps. It was satisfying to hear the song, a little piece of the puzzle that was my childhood, played once again in the story where it all started. 

The elation quickly fell flat. An hour and 45 minutes later, the last scene ends and the credits start to roll. 

I didn’t seem to have that sensation you get after watching a good movie, the feeling of content, the longing of wanting to watch the movie for the first time again. Rather, I felt underwhelmed.

Pinocchio (2022) is directed by Robert Zemeckis, who has also directed iconic films such as Back to the Future and Forrest Gump. You would expect Zemeckis to do a noteworthy job creating the live version of Pinocchio on the big screen, but at the end, the movie falls short of what it’s supposed to be.

Although the film is substandard, there is one aspect for which I can applaud it: the artistic flair.

The movie is seasoned with visually pleasing scenes. I particularly enjoyed when Pinocchio (Benjamin Evan Ainsworth) was transformed into a talking puppet by the Fairy With Turquoise Hair (Cynthia Erivo), as well as the Pleasure Island scene.

The transformation scene has quality use of lighting; the ignition of bright blue lights that appeared as the Fairy with Turquoise Hair casted her spell was truly ravishing. The color, the radiance and the softness of the illumination was touching to the heart. It feels mystical, and worthy of the iconic moment. 

The Pleasure Island scene is a memorable scene in the original Pinocchio, and the recent remake does a good job in making the scene flourish with detailed CGI effects and animation. Pleasure Island is a place in the world of Pinocchio that is said to be “the biggest joy joint in the world” and a place of no parents and no rules. In reality, the place is used to lure kids who have been disobedient towards their parents, and is a center of punishment.

The CGI pulls through to illustrate the intricate details of the myriad of fun activities and entertainment kids are exposed to when they arrive on the island. There are bright fireworks bursting in the air, colorful lights with vim and vigor paving the way for the children and the most impressive thing that comes out of this scene is the floating boat ride. Pinocchio hops onto a boat and is taken up to the sky where he is given a panoramic view of the island. Every crevice is blinded with lights, laughter, and utter chaos as Pinocchio is taken down for a ride into a huge pool of sweets and treats.

The animation of it all is both lively and terrifying. Everything seems oversaturated to the point where the island felt overwhelming rather than enjoyable and the fact the scene was able to capture that through the CGI is admirable.

Pinocchio (2022) checks off most boxes when it comes to technical criteria, but fails to emotionally fulfill its viewers.

Already having high expectations due to the famed actors playing the well-known characters, this adaptation did not meet my expectations. Tom Hanks, who plays Gepetto, does not stand out to the degree his expertise might suggest. He has problems being consistent with his accent, and his acting as a whole does not portray the importance of his character. It is truly disappointing since Gepetto is one of the main characters in the original tale. 

Other actors in the film face similar problems; however, the disappointing character portrayals are not solely caused by underwhelming acting, but also by the lack of depth in the writing itself.

Jiminy Cricket (Joseph-Gordon Levitt) is the narrator, who also acts as Pinocchio’s moral guide.  Although Jiminy is loyal to Pinocchio and puts his best efforts into trying to keep him in line, the messages Jiminy tried to convey throughout the film were hit or miss.  Jiminy would always get to Pinocchio at the last moment, and the lesson that he would try to teach Pinocchio didn’t feel meaningful. 

When you are watching a movie based on a tale that was written in 1883, the last thing that you would expect to hear is a joke about Chris Pine, and that is exactly what happened. Not only that, but there were an array of jokes that didn’t feel suited to the original. It feels cheesy and quite lazy to mention and make modern retorts in the movie.

The most consistent error was the pacing of the movie, which was poorly done and rendered the viewing experience mediocre at best. The last scene is the most engaging part of the movie, and even that was moderate. 

It is always disheartening to see something that was a remnant of your childhood diminish once you grow up, and that’s precisely what occurred when I watched Pinocchio. It fails to carry the same comfort or nostalgia the original envelops you with, instead sending you off thoroughly disenchanted.

Follow Sahasra (@sahasrachak24) and @CHSCampusNews on Twitter.