By Aisha Espinosa
Staff Writer
@aishaespinosa1

Twenty people crowd around a couch, squeezing together to fit into the frame of a picture. A gaggle of younger kids fill the space in front, smiles bright and wide. I wait until everyone has more or less settled into a spot before setting a 10 second timer, and scramble for an open spot. I make it to an empty space just as the flash goes off.

Hours later, the picture brings a smile to my face.

This group of adults and I, besides my parents, are not bound by blood. These are not my parents’ siblings by marriage, either. Instead, our group is comprised of Filipino families of various sizes, all with one thing in common: a move from the Philippines to Dallas.

These people are not my uncles and aunts, at least not officially.

My actual relatives are on opposite coasts of the United States, or across the Pacific Ocean. I love spending nights Skyping or talking over the phone, but it is not the same as being able to pop in for a visit to see my cousins or my aunt who spoils all of her nieces and nephews.

Having family in another country has made me more attentive to my own relationships – I look for friends that will be around for a long time, and try not to get too attached to people I know will not be around forever.

It took me too long to realize that friends are family too. Or at least, it took me too long to apply this mentality to my parent’s friends – my unofficial, unrelated aunts and uncles who have seen me grow up from a tiny three year old to a high school senior.

They have been there through all the milestones, like transitioning from middle to high school, and my 16th birthday. I get Christmas presents and birthday cards, and always receive warm greetings whenever the entire group gets together (which is often).  

It took me 15 years to realize that I was taking my unofficial family for granted. Now, on the verge of graduating from high school and possibly leaving this city for an extended period of time, I wish I had taken the initiative to spend a little more time with my “aunts” and “uncles”, or the younger kids I refer to as my cousins.

I wish I could have listened to more of their stories about college and high school, or that I could have spent more time with my younger “cousins.”  They all were always there, and I always thought that I would have more time to say thanks for being around, or spoil the next set of younger kids like they spoiled me.

But somehow, I only have months left before I move into a college dorm, and I wish I could go back and tell myself to not waste any moments.

Of all the things to take for granted, family and time are two of the easiest things to not appreciate for their value. But time is irreplaceable and family is invaluable, and we are all just old enough to start appreciating where we are in life and who we have to support us.