When you are little, you are taught to respect others; be kind to everyone no matter who they are or what they look like. But rarely are we reminded to love ourselves, which can easily be forgotten.

At some point most people have struggled with loving who they are. You find yourself being caught in a battle of self hate, wanting to change the smallest things to find yourself more pleasing.

Maybe you have admired someone else’s beauty, whether it be physical or inner, and ended up envious wanting to find change in yourself.

Instead of being envious, we need to learn to admire others without pushing judgement on ourselves. Everyone is beautiful in their own ways and learning to accept your own beauty is difficult.

Loving yourself means accepting who you are no matter your differences. Understand that you are not everyone else, you are your own person.

“If you are happy, you can give happiness,” fashion model Gisele Bundchen told Bazar magazine. “If you don’t love yourself and if you’re unhappy with yourself, you can’t give anything else but that.”

You cannot love others without loving yourself, otherwise, self consciously you will find faults in others that you see in yourself.

Kimberly Hatley, co-founder of Coppell Counseling Center and licensed professional counselor (LPC), opens up about self love.

“It makes it difficult for them to accept love and friendship; it makes it harder for them to trust others because they do not trust themselves,” Hatley said. “If they don’t accept themselves it would be hard for them to believe anybody else could appreciate them when they are overly critical of themselves.”

People who evoke confidence are seen as admirable. People find themselves drawn to those who are strong. Do not take for granted the person you are.

Finding acceptance within yourself takes time, so do not expect to wake up and suddenly change your previous opinions. You have to learn who you are before you can accept it; know what makes you, you.

If you do not like certain aspects of yourself, fix it; want to feel more knowledgeable; study, want to be more outgoing; socialize. Be open minded and learn from it. Soon you will realize how wonderful it can be to make a few changes and love who you are.

However, do not change yourself for others, only for yourself to better yourself. It may be a difficult process but it never hurts to make goals for yourself.

“It is important to focus on realistic expectations, for us as human beings we are fallible and make mistakes every single day,” Hatley said. “We have to learn to accept imperfection because perfection is not possible.”
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